A note from Ann...
Ann said:
You know..if you aren't going to talk about knitting...then you really need to start wrtiting bodice ripper short stories for your blog. I'm just sayin' you need to keep us interested, coming back for more.
I'm sorry. I know I haven't been knitting, and this was intended to be a knitting blog. And yeah, not pressured or stressed about anything at the moment, and yeah, school will start in a few weeks and all hell will break loose, and yeah, I won't have lots of time to sit around and eat bon-bons, and yeah, I know I have a pair of mittens to make for Bitchin' Mittens, and yeah, I know you come here to read about what I'm working on, which at the moment, is nothing.
SO, to keep YOU interested and coming back to read my blog (and YOU know who YOU are), I'm going to follow YOUR advice! I'm giving you a "Bodice Ripper" kit. Now, I'm not much of a writer of smut, although I do have quite a "colorful" vocabulary, and have been know to make truck drivers blush, or at least speechless. Here's what YOU do:
Take any of the following words, in any conjugation, in any order, and put them in sentences, and Voila! Bodice Ripper! (I'm not putting them in any order - that would be too easy for YOU, and I want YOU to have FUN!)
YOUR words:
heaving, wet, moist, torso, thigh, breast, lick, kiss, touch, grope, taste, bite, hair, mound, manhood, nape, bicept, sweat, bulge, crevice, pound, delight, thrust, moan, wimper, cry, scream, knees, give, take, groan, smile, eat, engulf, envelop, finger, leg, arm, pubis, ram, torture, tie, gauntlet, cod piece, stuffing, ooze, throbbing, spread, sit, force, man handle, pinch, twist, nipple, tug, pull, stroke, shoot, facial, eye, nose, gag, forest, pecs, shoulders, waste, buttocks, kneel, prone, nibble, ear, honey, wine, cherry, chocolate, nonpariels, swine, sword, sheath, handle, water, slide, grunt, declaration, eye patch, dun, wooden leg, spire, parrot, whistle, hand, pressure, goat, thief, pirate, page, widow, virgin, slut, whore, bastard, horse, mule, spigot, hose, dumpster, bed, table, tree, staircase, ship, bank vault, carriage, saddle, Woody Allen, grease, poker, ash can, water closet, broom handle, bodice, corset, bloomers, stockings, wart, knuckle, Lizzie Borden, hatchet, mutton broth, pears, corn cob, Crisco, rolling pin, apron, French Maid, fish-net stockings, stiletto heels, satin, silk, flow, drip, and crank shaft.
There. Feel free to add words of your own (I'm sure I must have missed several), and remember, have fun. Especially YOU
Oh, and while YOU'RE writing YOUR Bodice Ripper, have a cookie. They're tasty.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA......... *sigh*
I love my knitting friends...... I Love You, Ann!!!



17 Comments:
OMG! Are you trying to build up your Goole search hits or what? You're gonna be spammed from slutty bodice-ripping whores for sure, dude. Complete with cornholing and EVERYTHING!
Throw down the gauntlet, expect it to be picked up my evil twin...
Heh Heh Heh
I just knew there was a reason why I kept coming back here.
BTW, those cookies really need some frosting.... Pinkish, I think.
The cookies were decorated by guests at a party I had last Decenber. We laugheed like idiots, and I gave prizes. The woman who got first prize got hers to stand up very erect...
hehehehe
Those are funny looking dog bones.
LMAO!!! The famous *P* Cookies... yayyyyyy! They look.... very tastey! Ohhhh, you should bodice rip more often! *love you, hon*
Ilaughed my ass off - and I really needed that after yesterday's physical therapy hurt!
Now we're talking!
Lol...love the cookies. Where did you find a cookie cutout like that? hahaha
I think they need to be decorated with a very fine icing tip using thin curly lines of chocolate -- at least at the base ... ***blush**
Those are some mighty big cookies you have there! Freeform or cookie cutter? My eyes of course went right to the cookies so I passed up all the bodice ripper words. Never have gotten into that genre anyway.
Holy Shit, Paul!! *L*
Nice Cookies and Words. o.0
Ann is inspiring isn't she. ;^)
Hmm sounds like my weekend ;-x hehehe
I love those cookies. This was an awesome post Paul!
wow, pacifiers for prostitutes on a plate. that's very cool.
OMG! April, that's the BEST comment! Hehehehehe.....
p.s. Did you notice that you won sock yarn over at my place?
Wow...your penis cookies look delicious. and filling....
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